what I do instead

Written By Lynn Dorman, Ph.D. | Smarter | 0 Comments

It’s THAT time of the year — again [sigh]

My inbox and social media feeds are filled with mail/posts selling me on the advantages of:

planners
courses about planning
products on how to use AI to make my year “better” “great” “etc.”
health-related info on starting the year off the “right” way
making resolutions [personal and business]
and more…

Except for the AI which is sort of new this year — the posting and the emails are the same every December and January.

But last year some of it started back earlier in the Fall because everyone knows:

“I have to get your attention about January 2024 in the middle of the summer or early fall or else you won't buy my product.”

It’s fine if you do the above - and even better if making resolutions works for you…

I no longer make them.

I used to.

I’d read a lot of that “how to succeed” stuff, that “guru” stuff, that “my friends say this works” stuff, and would make a list of what I would accomplish in the upcoming year….

Then at some point during the year, I’d look at my resolution list and laugh [or cry] as so little of it ever got done! Or done with any degree of consistency.

So I stopped making New Year resolutions. It seemed to not be good for my mental health OR my productivity. My brain doesn't like lists!!

I've discovered that I am not alone. Many, if not most, people did not follow theirs either.

Especially these:

"I am going to exercise every day” resolution or “I am going to lose X pounds this year” or “I am going to lose 5 pounds a month.”

And work-related resolutions?

The “I will write a post a day,” or “I will write a book before Summer,” or I will do X by Y time frame.

Ditto the very popular “I will be making $XXX a month by the end of March or April” type of resolution.

These resolutions generally do not work.

Why? We tend to set impossible resolutions or standards for ourselves. They are often more wishful thinking than actual planned-out behaviors. Not sticking to these resolutions may make us feel like failures so early in the new year, and yes, the ad people play into this guilt.

Watch ads early in the year and note those aimed at making us feel guilt and shame over NOT keeping resolutions. They may not be direct, but they are aimed at guilt making!!

my insteads

With two major professional degrees and several accolades, I know I am not a failure.

I actually CAN and DO accomplish things - but I have ceased the resolution-type thinking and adopted a more casual approach to my life. It took some hard work on my part to re-think the business/life model that keeps telling us we “need” to make a yearly, monthly, daily plan… or else!

I choose "or else"

Opting for the “or else” works for me!

Every choice can be the “correct way!"

I let my mind wander!

I now enjoy late December/early January as we get an added minutes of daylight every afternoon.

I use this light/dark scenario to reflect, have fun, and think about my work - but not make any of this into resolutions,
to-do lists, or anything tightly scheduled!

I do a non-journal kind of journaling

I call it my mental meandering but it’s more like a brain dump. This is one activity I do most every day but without the “I must do it” kind of thinking, so I often don't do this. And that’s okay!

Apple has made this easier for me as they released a journal app and I have started using that app - but still not every day - I figure a few days a week [maybe] works for me.

Hmmmm Is there a perfect brain time?

As part of the ongoing blog challenge, and honestly part of my almost every day personal/business challenge, is making a specific time to work only on a specific goal - usually part of a long-range goal. I do that during the day but I don't have a specific time, it is more random from day to day and therefore on many days I let other things get in the way and then all of a sudden it's time to go to bed and it's the next day and I haven't done the one or two things I know I need to do to keep working towards a specific goal. Another part of my problem is that my goal[s] tends to vary from day today - that's me and that something I'm working on.

But, and this is good for me, as part of the challenge today I am to figure out a 15 to 20 minute part of the day where I will work on my goals. Only 20 minutes or 15 minutes? I think I can figure out what times of the day that can happen and happen daily.

I've done something like this before and I know it works. But me, being me, stops using tactics like this after I finish one major project and I get into other stuff and then get off track again. So what I am going to do is go back to what I know worked before. That is to start my day with my coffee and my first 20 or 25 of focused activity. Given that I have a dog and I eat and I drink more coffee I will take a break after that 25 minutes and have breakfast. I will also have more coffee and then take the dog for her morning stroll. Then I shall come back and do another 20 minutes or 25 minutes. I know I work better with breaks so that will be session number two and I will take a break after that and do fun type stuff. Then I will come back and do another 20 or 25 minutes of work.

I know my best work hours are between 9 AM and 1 PM so I shall do these 20 or 25 minutes segments in that period of time and not try to push myself past that 1 PM timeframe. I may do yoga in between some of the 25-minute work sessions because I also think yoga helps me get my mind back on track. It certainly keeps my body feeling better.

What I will do that is a bit different than what I have done in the past is to spend the first part of the first 20 minutes session prioritizing what it is I am going to be doing that day. When I tried making myself a priority list the night before I forget about it - it's written down and my brain considers it done. So I have to get back to prioritizing my day after I am awake and while I'm having my coffee.

As it is now mid afternoon and I'm still on a roll I may get some of my focused work done today even though it's past my usual work hour. Part of what I'm also working on is the ability to refocus at different times of the day or night.

Thoughts? Ideas? Comments? Thank you!!

This blog post is in response to Natalie’s 10 Day Freedom Plan Blog Challenge Day 5

Do you make resolutions? Do they work for you? Or if not - what do you do - if anything? Please comment below and thank you for reading.

Finding That Perfect Brain Time

what I do instead

my insteads

I choose "or else"

I let my mind wander!

Hmmmm Is there a perfect brain time?

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