My Superpowers Are……..

what I do instead

Written By Lynn Dorman, Ph.D.  |  Musings  |  0 Comments

list of resolutions

It’s THAT time of the year — again [sigh]

My inbox and social media feeds are filled with mail/posts selling me on the advantages of:

  • planners
  • courses about planning
  • products on how to use AI to make my year “better” “great” “etc.”
  • health-related info on starting the year off the “right” way
  • making resolutions [personal and business]
  • and more…

Except for the AI which is sort of new this year — the posting and the emails are the same every December and January.

But last year some of it started back earlier in the Fall because everyone knows:

“I have to get your attention about January 2024 in the middle of the summer or early fall or else you won't buy my product.”

It’s fine if you do the above - and even better if making resolutions works for you…

I no longer make them.

I used to.

I’d read a lot of that “how to succeed” stuff, that “guru” stuff, that “my friends say this works” stuff, and would make a list of what I would accomplish in the upcoming year….

Then at some point during the year, I’d look at my resolution list and laugh [or cry] as so little of it ever got done! Or done with any degree of consistency.

So I stopped making New Year resolutions. It seemed to not be good for my mental health OR my productivity. My brain doesn't like lists!!

I've discovered that I am not alone. Many, if not most, people did not follow theirs either.

Especially these:

"I am going to exercise every day” resolution or “I am going to lose X pounds this year” or “I am going to lose 5 pounds a month.”


And work-related resolutions?

The “I will write a post a day,” or “I will write a book before Summer,” or I will do X by Y time frame.

Ditto the very popular “I will be making $XXX a month by the end of March or April” type of resolution.

These resolutions generally do not work.

Why? We tend to set impossible resolutions or standards for ourselves. They are often more wishful thinking than actual planned-out behaviors. Not sticking to these resolutions may make us feel like failures so early in the new year, and yes, the ad people play into this guilt.

Watch ads early in the year and note those aimed at making us feel guilt and shame over NOT keeping resolutions. They may not be direct, but they are aimed at guilt making!!

my insteads 

With two major professional degrees and several accolades, I know I am not a failure.

I actually CAN and DO accomplish things - but I have ceased the resolution-type thinking and adopted a more casual approach to my life. It took some hard work on my part to re-think the business/life model that keeps telling us we “need” to make a yearly, monthly, daily plan… or else!


I choose "or else"


Opting for the “or else” works for me! 

Every choice can be the “correct way!"


I let my mind wander!

I now enjoy late December/early January as we get an added minutes of daylight every afternoon. 

I use this light/dark scenario to reflect, have fun, and think about my work - but not make any of this into resolutions,
to-do lists, or anything tightly scheduled!


I do a non-journal kind of journaling

I call it my mental meandering but it’s more like a brain dump. This is one activity I do most every day but without the “I must do it” kind of thinking, so I often don't do this. And that’s okay!

Apple has made this easier for me as they released a journal app and I have started using that app - but still not every day - I figure a few days a week [maybe] works for me.

As part of the ongoing 10 day blog challenge, today I am supposed to think about and tell you about at least 2 of my superpowers.

The first superpower that I have that comes to mind has to do with writing it's kind of a combined superpower. I write fast. I write well. [But I hate typing so the fact that computers now do dictating is enabling my superpower to be more super and more powerful.] I have taken to writing approximately 1000 words a day and if I really get on a roll I can dictate those thousand words in less than 10 minutes. I don't know if that has to do with being a New Yorker and speaking fast or what but anyway I really could write a lot. My problem and that wasn't part of this is doing something with all those words that I write so quickly and well. They sit on my computer - so I need a superpower called editing.

My second superpower is that I connect dots very quickly and in ways that other people do not connect them. I have been really good at helping other people see what is going on in their lives and that's why I was a good therapist. I like helping people I don't know if that's a third super power or part of my connecting the dots superpower. Again this next part was not included in today's challenge but this superpower is one that gets in my way very often because I see so many of the dots and have a connect to other docs and have those dots connect to yet other dots and it is all so fascinating to my agile brain that I tend to forget what it is that I was actually working on to begin with. That though what is the subject of the book I just finished which is titled: I'mNott Confused; I'm Nonlinear. I actually got it finished! It was tough but it's done.
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Thoughts? Comments? Thank you!!

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Do you make resolutions? Do they work for you? Or if not - what do you do - if anything? Please comment below and thank you for reading.  

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