It’s THAT time of the year — again [sigh]
My inbox and social media feeds are filled with mail/posts selling me on the advantages of:
- planners
- courses about planning
- products on how to use AI to make my year “better” “great” “etc.”
- health-related info on starting the year off the “right” way
- making resolutions [personal and business]
- and more…
Except for the AI which is sort of new this year — the posting and the emails are the same every December and January.
But last year some of it started back earlier in the Fall because everyone knows:
“I have to get your attention about January 2024 in the middle of the summer or early fall or else you won't buy my product.”
It’s fine if you do the above - and even better if making resolutions works for you…
I no longer make them.
I used to.
I’d read a lot of that “how to succeed” stuff, that “guru” stuff, that “my friends say this works” stuff, and would make a list of what I would accomplish in the upcoming year….
Then at some point during the year, I’d look at my resolution list and laugh [or cry] as so little of it ever got done! Or done with any degree of consistency.
So I stopped making New Year resolutions. It seemed to not be good for my mental health OR my productivity. My brain doesn't like lists!!
I've discovered that I am not alone. Many, if not most, people did not follow theirs either.
Especially these:
"I am going to exercise every day” resolution or “I am going to lose X pounds this year” or “I am going to lose 5 pounds a month.”
And work-related resolutions?
The “I will write a post a day,” or “I will write a book before Summer,” or I will do X by Y time frame.
Ditto the very popular “I will be making $XXX a month by the end of March or April” type of resolution.
These resolutions generally do not work.
Why? We tend to set impossible resolutions or standards for ourselves. They are often more wishful thinking than actual planned-out behaviors. Not sticking to these resolutions may make us feel like failures so early in the new year, and yes, the ad people play into this guilt.
Watch ads early in the year and note those aimed at making us feel guilt and shame over NOT keeping resolutions. They may not be direct, but they are aimed at guilt making!!
my insteads
With two major professional degrees and several accolades, I know I am not a failure.
I actually CAN and DO accomplish things - but I have ceased the resolution-type thinking and adopted a more casual approach to my life. It took some hard work on my part to re-think the business/life model that keeps telling us we “need” to make a yearly, monthly, daily plan… or else!
I choose "or else"
Opting for the “or else” works for me!
Every choice can be the “correct way!"
I let my mind wander!
I now enjoy late December/early January as we get an added minutes of daylight every afternoon.
I use this light/dark scenario to reflect, have fun, and think about my work - but not make any of this into resolutions,
to-do lists, or anything tightly scheduled!
I do a non-journal kind of journaling
I call it my mental meandering but it’s more like a brain dump. This is one activity I do most every day but without the “I must do it” kind of thinking, so I often don't do this. And that’s okay!
Apple has made this easier for me as they released a journal app and I have started using that app - but still not every day - I figure a few days a week [maybe] works for me.
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Over the years I have learned how to deal with certain aspects of my own brain or mind.
No resolutions for me, either.
And I have the exact same experience with to-do lists like you, Lynn. I evolved mine to a pensieve: a list whose main purpose is to get rid of all the ideas, wishes etc. That keep clogging up my mind. If the idea is important enough to me, it will materialize in some form. If it does not, it didn’t need to. Apparently.
Making the list is still very helpful, though. It will usually spur a set of useful, but different activities. Somehow the ones occupying my mind kept those hidden.
As for resolutions: if I want to do something, I’ll try to plan it e.g. Make room in my schedule and /or find someone to do it with. If I can’t do either, … I am not doing it! And delete it : )
I like your attitude. I do have lists – I use spiral bound notebooks for jotting down ideas and for my writing when I don’t want to be at the computer…I now label the books by the year and it’s fun to go back thru old ones and see if and what I actually did get done and then decide about mentally ditching the undone or moving it forward since it may now “fit” or blend in with newer ideas. Your comment got me going on how to work with this brain of mine – so again – thank you.
Lynn
I don’t set New Year’s Resolutions either – personal circumstances can change so quickly that things change overnight sometimes. Start the year with a few goals and work towards them
Thank you – yes our lives change and it may then be silly to stick to a resolution that is set in stone –
Happy New Year !
Resolutions and me don’t seem to get along.
I prefer to set goals / targets (and then mentally check them off as I go along)
This year is no different .. although I did find some affirmations that are easy to achieve 😉 check them out hehe
Good points – thanks for adding them. I do make some lists – like for shopping 🙂
I don’t do resolutions either – I don’t like the pressure it creates. I do set goals though – this seems to suit me better.
Ahh – yes the pressure – good point and thank you for saying it!