Are You A Competitive Parent? Part 1

by Lynn Dorman, Ph.D. // July 1 // 8 Comments

In the USA there are many parents who have gotten into a behavior that I call “competitive parenting.”


This competing has been around for a while – but now seems to have gotten worse – and it has spread into many more areas of a child’s development. 

Even into areas over which a parent has little control!

We hear of parents signing up their not-yet-born children for the “best” nursery schools so as to ensure future entrance to colleges such as Harvard or Yale.

What a burden on that child! What if that child does not want to go to those schools – or heaven forbid – does not want to go to college at all? Or is not accepted?

We have parents pressuring children to get “good” grades as early as nursery school and kindergarten. I knew of a child who got ulcers in the 1st grade because she “only” got an A- or B+ on some assignments and her parents were making her study more so as to raise that to a solid A [no minus marks or B’s allowed in that family.]

Somehow making sure your child is seen as better than and faster than “those other children” either makes you seem like a better parent or proves your child is genius [and of course that will reflect back on you the genius parent.]

Please stop it!

Kids have enough to do just to develop…they don’t need added pressure from parents trying to prove something to the world.

Next – competition around weaning and toilet training…..

 

Thoughts? Comments? Thank you.

 

 

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