3 tips for new parents to help you lessen guilt

Tip 1 – Stop chatting with everyone

Everyone has parenting advice – even people who have never had kids!

You start getting this mostly-unsolicited advice when you are pregnant because unless you never look pregnant, you are a target for child rearing advice.

t’s part of the human psyche to offer advice to pregnant women – and it’s been done since way back when.

Here’s the way it usually goes:

h, you’re pregnant. That’s great. I know a good pediatrician – her name is…or there are such good new toys for newborns – you can get them at… or have you heard about the new music to play while you are pregnant – it will make your child a genius – and by the way – do you know if you’re having a girl or a boy?

You almost can’t avoid this onslaught of advice – so best to be polite and say “thank you” – but do not engage in the conversation.

[This onslaught continues if you have a baby or toddler with you so practice now.]

If you engage – you are caught for a long chat about babies!

Tip 2 stop reading every book or magazine you find on parenting

Google “books on parenting advice” and you will find 1000’s of sites! You cannot read them all – even in several lifetimes. Don’t even try.

Tip 3 trust yourself

Stop and ask yourself who will be raising your baby? The people with advice?  The books?

• Who will responsible for making the moment-to-moment decisions?
• Who will feed?
• Who will diaper?
• Who will play with?

That baby is YOURS!

You the parent[s] have to trust yourself at some point and you can start right now.

Comments? Thoughts?

As I write much about nutrition, I have been asked: In terms of healthier children, what is the best time for a female to start eating well?

Answer: BEFORE you even consider getting pregnant! Preferably when still in your teens!

So – BIG OOPS!!  What happens if you did not? We all know teen diets outside the home are not usually nutritious and that adult women may not eat well either. 

What to do?

If getting pregnant is in your future – start eating well NOW!  Or as soon as you think you are pregnant – start getting good nutrition Immediately.

In the USA we have a long history of not taking care of pregnant women; especially poorer pregnant women – while knowing that good nutrition during pregnancy would help solve many of the problems that newborns come into the world with.

Decades ago I saw a film about the high costs associated with early prenatal care of infants born to malnourished mothers. Intensive care nurseries are very expensive – yet the cost of feeding a pregnant woman with good food is minimal. Over those decades, the cost of food has not risen to the levels of the costs for the newborn intensive care – so why do we still not feed pregnant women?  Answer: Politics…..[and that's for another day and another eBook or blog: http://lynnsrants.com]

A growing fetus needs protein – so the mother must eat that protein or the fetus does not get it. A long held myth is that babies will take what they need from the mother's body.  Not true. The mother needs to ingest the nourishment while she is pregnant or it is not there for the fetus.

Long term effects of poor nutrition during pregnancy are problematic births, delayed physical and cognitive growth and ongoing illnesses. This is worsened if the child continues to be malnourished after it is born. And malnourishment, while found more often in poorer homes, is not absent from homes of the wealthy.  Just having money does not create common sense!

What is good nourishment? Protein is important as is a balanced diet. Junk food is not nutritious for anyone! Diet sodas and chemically doctored food that supposedly tastes good is not nourishing….Prepackaged "stuff" [I dare not call it food] is not nourishing.

Look at the labels on the food you are buying next time you in a store. You might find words there that you cannot pronounce. One of my mantras is that if I can't read the small print or I can't even pronounce the name of the ingredient – I don't want it in my body…and I'm well past child bearing age